It's All About Me

I have to tell my sisters to watch videos I post online. I share my videos on Facebook (we're friends). I share my videos on Twitter (we follow each other). And to top it off, I personally got on their YouTube accounts and subscribed them to my channel. All that, and I STILL have to tell them when I post things, and even that doesn't guarantee they'll see it. This is what I have to do to get attention from family, the people who I previously assumed were most likely to be my best supporters.

I have one person who will, without any additional prompting, watch what I post. I'm pretty sure I have to call him my best friend now (he's earned it, just on that meritt). But besides him, I have no fan base and that kills me a little bit. I have a thing that I do, and only one person gives an entire fuck when I do it. This is some of the most discouraging shit I've been through.

So, I figure for the sake of my mental/emotional health, I should stop counting on anyone else to give a rats ass about any of my videos or recordings and just do it for me. Because clearly, that's the only person I can guarantee will ever know about it. I'll just keep trying to impress myself, which is actually pretty easy to do. I sang. I sang and played guitar at the same time. I sang and played guitar at the same time and recorded myself doing it. I sang and played my guitar at the same time, recorded myself doing it, and posted it on the internet. In my book, that was some bold shit, considering how self-conscious I am of my playing and how sure I was that I was a bad singer. And look at me. Twice now, I've sang and played and put it where the world can consume it. Fuck them if they don't.

50 points for reading. +1000 if you listen to my stuff, because all I want is an audience. You don't even have to like it, just fucking listen.

JOSH, THE SHERM