We Need to Talk...

I wrote this about a month ago, but found myself in a situation that was (by no coincidence) similar to what was going on last year. As of today, that's a done deal, and I survived it, so I feel like now is an appropriate time to release this blog.

When you hear the phrase "we need to talk" you instantly prepare yourself for bad news. This isn't necessarily bad news, but it isn't necessarily good, either.

I post this openly on the internet for all to see, but I'm only talking to those of you who actually know me. If you don't know me, keep reading. Maybe some good could come of it. I know my audience is small (rarely do I get more than 20 hits on a post), but that makes this all the more personal.

The thing we need to talk about takes place in April of last year. That's when I posted the "My Note Card Story" video (click here to watch), in which I poke a little fun at the trend of flashcard sob stories, infringe on Kanye West's copyrights, and also make it seem as though my life was great, problem-free, hakuna matata.

For anyone who doesn't know me, they can rightfully take that video at face value. They have no reason to believe my life is any different than I describe it. They have no vested interest in my well-being. But you--my friends, my family--you have led me to believe that you care, and are concerned for the quality of my life. This is where the "not good" part starts. You cannot take this video at face value, because you know there's a lot more to the story than what I jotted down with a sharpie. That is why I am a little disappointed in you.

Nobody called me on it. Nobody said anything to me about how they could see through my BS. You knew I wasn't happy. You knew that at that particular time, my life was becoming increasingly complex. You knew I was frustrated with school, and people and life in general. But you let it go. You let me act like everything was all hunky dory. The day after I posted that video, I recorded this one (please excuse the language and bad audio quality). I never bothered to share it until now, because it was (and is) embarrassing to watch, and it's exactly contrary to the one I'd just used to get laughs. To clarify, nothing I say in the second video was a secret. I had talked to people and ranted about it on Facebook and Twitter several times, none of which really helped to solve my problems. My stories didn't line up. That's a problem, and someone should have corrected me.

If it happens again, you say something. Let me know you're paying attention. Don't let me ignore or downplay my problems. Make me turn and look them square in the face, and then help me fight through them if it comes down to it. I may not know how to thank you, but I always appreciate good guidance. Let's you and me not let something like this slide ever again.

Good talk?
Good talk.

The usual 50 points for reading. You should really start keeping track of your points. I've been thinking of ways to make them matter. +500 points if you saw the note card video before I posted this blog. And an extra 100 for everybody, just to foster some goodwill.

JOSH, THE SHERM