Take note: this is the first post!

     Soooo...... I'm blogging again.  I did it when Myspace was cool, but I fell off when I got to Facebook, sorta half doing it with notes.  I'm moving in over here, though, to blog on Facebook no more.  I considered the idea of a themed blog, where I have a specific purpose and I blog about one thing that I do on a regular basis. Alas, I don't do any one thing on a regular enough basis to dedicate a blog to it, so I'll just type whatever I think is important enough to post.  But this lack of a consistent theme brings me to a point.
     I am a "jack of all trades and master of none." The only thing I've mastered so far in my life is half-assing. I can half-ass like a champ.  Start a new project? I'm down for that. Join a team? Yes, I will, thank you. Come to a meeting for this club? Sure thing.  The problem is never the beginning. Starting is easy enough. It's the follow through that I'm missing. I've never been so naturally gifted at something that I was an all-star right off the bat, and I've never driven myself to achieve any pinnacle of greatness. I put in that initial effort, just that tiny push that it takes to get going, maybe throw in a little extra work so I don't look like a slacker, and then I just ride that out.
     Clearly this is my fault. I haven't payed the price to be on top. I haven't put in the required work. Still, you would think by now that I would have found my "thing" and been diligently working to hone that skill. The fact of the matter is, I would if I could. I've had hint and suggestion and clue galore about what my thing is but nothing seems fulfilling to me. For example, I love music, I even play a few instruments, but music theory confounds me and I am limited to what I can do with what little understanding I have. I have a real knack for finding out things I want to know, but when it comes down to it, I can only do it effectively when it suits my fancy (I can do research all day, but have wet to write a research paper without breaking something in the process). Writing is another thing. Everyone seems to be so impressed with my writing. They see the finished product and they are pleased with what they see. What they don't get to witness is me flipping shit trying to come up with a topic, then having to flip shit again when I realize my stance on the topic is worthless, invalid, wrong, common, unrelated, incomprehensible, or for any other reason not worth writing about. Writing is another one of those things that I can only do well when it amuses me to do so.
     Case and point, I have yet to find the thing that I am good at and enjoy doing. Until I find that thing I guess I'll keep trying new things and complaining about what I'm not good at.
     Also, I'm going back to awarding existence points. You get 50 for reading the whole blog, +20 for agreeing with me, +50 more if you are in the same non-specializing situation.

JOSH, THE SHERM